have i grown cold and heartless? maybe i do. perhaps now only the loudest music and strongest alcohol can penetrate my restless soul, make me fallible.
i might be meeting yanbin tonight. part of me really dread this meeting, but another part of me wanna hear how lousy he's feeling or doing. i can forgive, but i will never forget. i don't hate him, but neither do i like him. in the past, i'll put down whatever work i have to spend time with him. but now, an extra minute with him probably just makes me feel as if im wasting my time fucking an amoeba. yes, you heard me.
im waiting for that vicious laughter of victory at the end of this battle, you'd better not grant me that chance. prove that you can do better without me. if not, just fuck off.